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Intensely Exclusive October 6, 2009

Posted by Yvonne in Drawings.
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it was an intense relationship _ in a direct and exclusive sort of way

Intensely Exclusive

Intensely Exclusive

If I remember rightly, this drawing came up at the end of an experiment in which I recently participated – an investigation into group learning using WoW as the platform.

I don’t know if others consider that they have a relationship with their computers or what types of relationships those may be, but I found that, although we were focused on the interactions among  humans, my relationship to and with the “machine” (meaning both the computer and the software/environment) was almost as interesting.

One surprising insight early on was that by operating in the game environment, I realized how much (in the Game of Life) I rely on cues and awareness, access for which hadn’t yet been replicated in game – or maybe access to that awareness is just not yet evident to the novice/apprentice level player.

Although I could orient the visual field of the avatar through a much wider range than my body’s physical point of view, looking out from my eyes in the front of my head, that expanded range in game didn’t provide the particular kind of awareness I found I use constantly and transparently in meatspace. The experience was a bit like missing my back.

When I mentioned this to a couple of the WoW game masters on the team, they (both male) were surprised and intrigued not having noticed that for themselves. So maybe it’s a gal thing – I don’t know.

In game, what you have to work with is your avatar, and your control is via the display, keyboard, mouse & headset. In the Game of Life, what you have to work with is your self and your control is … well, that’s the question, isn’t it … mind+body? soma? structures of communication? ???

So it became an investigation of the relationship of one’s self to one’s apparatus, as it were – one’s extensions into life — a very intense, direct and exclusive kind of relationship, you see?

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A poem from last year surfaces once again … August 11, 2006

Posted by Yvonne in Poems.
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UNSENT

Never known.

The lost and forever unlived loving of summer cool days.

The connection not made. Silences unshared, only alone … at once present and never seen. Unheard, no sound. There and not. Here away.

What is life in the living, no action, no feeling, no thing. No thing. None. Nada, Nyet.

Inarticulate. Without art culminating ate.

How can I forget?

Let me let you go.

Unmoved he is unmoved.

Enchanted and then dashed.

Nowhere gone gone. Gone done gone.

Ever after

See me. Promised eyes.

Stupid emotion of a girl.

–YMB 7/21/04