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The Mirror Trick: You Are Beautiful! May 27, 2006

Posted by Yvonne in Distinctions, Indirect Approach.

A couple weekends ago, I was with a dear friend, Kaaren Henderson, a brilliant woman who has created a fabulous workshop to bring out the beauty in everywoman. For more info, check out Body Feng Shui.

At the workshop, I shared a trick I learned, and she asked me to write it up. So I thought I'd share it here too … 

We all know about the power of positive self-talk, and we all know how challenging mirrors can be, but here’s a trick that really works. 

I work from home. And there’s a mirror just to the right of my desk. Sometimes, when I’m on the phone or shifting gears between activities, I catch a glance of myself. How often, you might ask, am I tempted to judge what I look like? “Sit up straight! No lipstick? Where are your earrings … oh hush, I’m still in my p.j.s!”

Then I realized that when I look in the mirror, my image takes up only part of what I see. But there is also the background which reflects the window and the wall to the left of my desk. And that wall was blank.

So thinking I’d like to see something nice when I look in the mirror, I selected an art print of a lovely girl/goddess that is inspiring to me. 

Now when I glance to wall at the left of my desk, she’s there. And when I glance to the right, I see myself in the mirror, but I also see her serene and beautiful reflection.

Now, rather than thinking, “Oops, who didn’t do my hair yet this morning?”, I instantly think: “She’s beautiful!” Then I look at myself and just smile and feel great.

And, LOL, I don’t think my subconscious really knows the difference!



1. Better BetterSearch - June 5, 2006

I don’t think the mirror can improve intelligence or age, however

2. rockwatching - June 8, 2006

Too much time on your hands. Take the mirror down and you will think about your appearance less. I mean its important to look presentable but after that, so what, your actions will take care of the rest. Mick http://rockwatching.wordpress.com

3. Yvonne - June 8, 2006

Thanks for the suggestion, Mick, but I did say "glance" (the mirror happens to be right over the phone) not "stare" so maybe you just missed the temporality of the piece.

And while I agree presentation isn't the main thing, it's generally pretty hard to get on in life without dealing with having a body. Add to that the fact that, for survival, most humans have developed a keen judger/evaluator portion of their brain, and on top of that, certain other well-ingrained influences of western culture that promote image over substance and you can get some insidious ill-effects on the spirit (especially for women) – and that is so even for regular folk that aren't neurotic or anything. They are just going through life and yet frequently experience negative self-talk.

So the trick was devised to counter this – just to ease up the negativity a bit.

And the mirror will stay because it's useful when it's useful, which is why I put it there in the first place, not because I had nothing to do but think about my appearance.

All that said, I admit that recently I've been enjoying being a woman even more, and after working with Kaaren, it's an especially rewarding, new kind of fun for me: living as a work of art. I've found that being an intentionally decorated woman now and then is actually inspiring, and people I run into seem to enjoy it too, just as I appreciate when others show their sartorial talents adding a created, expressiveness to the cityscape. There's just nothing like being out with the gals and having all of us beaming in our own very personal, powerful, natural beauty. It's breathtaking really, and a profound gift I find. And it makes us happy.

So that's what the post was really supporting. Thanks very much for engaging and providing the impetus for me to say a bit more about this.


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